Never Ever Ring The Bell ...
January 31, 2025
Beginning. Starting. Commencing. What does beginning well actually look like?
Sometimes when we expect a perfect start, we overlook the quiet power of simply showing up, the world is run by those who show up. Those people who never, ever ring the bell, those people who show up, even when it is hard to do so, especially when it is hard to do so. Brene Brown reminds us that “the willingness to show up changes us, it makes us a little braver each time we do.” In enacting bravery, it is important to start small if that’s what it takes.
American Naval Admiral, William McRaven says this: “If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed. If you can’t do the little things right, then you will never do the big things right.” He believes in persistence. His mantra is this: don’t ever, ever ring the bell. He refers to the initial training for the United States of America Navy Sea, Air, and Land Teams the SEALS. Their initial training sees more than 80 percent of participants drop out.
During this training, a brass bell hangs in the center of the room for all the students to see. If they find the work too hard. If they decide against becoming a SEAL. All they have to do to quit—is to ring the bell. Ring the bell and they no longer have to wake up at 5 o’clock. Ring the bell and they no longer have to complete freezing cold swims. Ring the bell and they no longer have to endure long runs carrying heavy weights, the obstacle courses, or to suffer the hardships of training. Just ring the bell and it’s all over.
When exhausted SEAL candidates reach their breaking point, they haul themselves to the bell and ring it three times. The sound echoes through the training grounds and announces publicly that another candidate has “opted out.” All they have to do is ring the bell. Just ring the bell and the hard work stops.
I wonder if Lilli Hamilton (Queensland cricketer and HEAT member) rang the bell when Cricket training no longer felt like it was fun, or if Alex Edwards (Australian Orienteering representative) opted out of orienteering because frankly, the distance was too far, or if Scarlett Sippell (Emus National Youth Touch Football Squad member) gave up because training was too tough …. what they would miss out on … When we opt out, even when it is hard, we also miss out on possibilities.
There are so many opportunities at Fairholme to achieve one’s best - academically. In the Arts. In Sport. Opportunities to serve others. To be a good friend – a good person. But then again, if any of those things are too hard, all anyone has to do is – opt out. Say it’s too hard. Say they didn’t get selected in the right team. Say their teachers didn’t give them the right results. Say they weren’t given the right position. Text their parents and tell them that Fairholme is awful. All they have to do, is ring the bell.
Yet, if we want to change the world, If we want to get the best out of this year at Fairholme, whatever that involves - never ever give up. Start small, aim big. Always show up. Don’t give up. Don’t ever, ever ring the bell. The most meaningful changes in life are often built in the times that no one sees, and, importantly, in the daily decision to simply show up, and to show up for others.
When my daughter, Natalie was twenty-one, she began her teaching career at an Autism specialty school in Brixton, London. She would phone me often: for advice, for debriefing, for re-setting – her school was classified as being in Special Measures – it was on the brink of closure. Often, when she phoned to describe her day – to talk about the boys in her class, all aged 12 or 13, it went a little like this: “Today, Mashley threw a chair through a window because he didn’t like the activity we were doing. I had to break up a fight at lunch. Jerome pulled a knife on me. Three boys in my class have joined gangs.” I wanted to say: “Natalie: get another job. That one is too dangerous.” I wanted to fly her home from London, immediately. I had to stop the urge to board the next plane to London and rescue her. But my advice to her – was this: Show up. Keep showing up. No matter how you feel… Get up, dress up, show up: don’t give up. These kids need to know that someone cares enough to show up. After all, when we show up for others, we can affect the most profound of changes.
I am always intrigued about who shows up here at Fairholme – especially at difficult times. In 2011 when floods ravaged Toowoomba and so much of Fairholme was flooded – staff showed up - in their holidays. They turned up to rip up carpets, move furniture, clean floors, and walls. Last year, in the sadness of Sess’ passing our community showed up, in droves, with deep compassion – importantly, our community showed up for one another.
I think of 2024 Year 12s who showed up for others, after they had officially finished attending classes at and were preparing for or undertaking their external exams. Lizzy Kelly and Ciara Teahan showed up to play in the stage band, for the Year 11 Leaders Assembly, so that the group could perform at its best. Roma Aarons came to an Assembly in November to share a fabulous rendition of ‘Hotel California’. On a Sunday morning, early in December, graduated students Rachel Yap, Alana Callaghan, Amelia Ramia and Roma Aarons, showed up at Rosies to prepare food for Toowoomba people who don’t have easy access to basic necessities.
After last year’s Interschool Athletics Carnival, Clare Hogan noticed staff picking up loads of lost property and carrying it into the Assembly Hall. She asked – Can I help?
When we show up, especially when it is for others, especially when it’s hard, we learn a lot about ourselves and others. The students at the school where my daughter taught in Brixton, London – needed teachers to show up, they needed people to notice them, they needed interest, care, attention. They needed to know that they mattered.
The willingness to show up changes us. It makes us a little braver each time, particularly when we show up for others.
Show up. Keep showing up. Show up for others. And remember the advice of Naval Admiral, William McRaven … even when it’s hard, don’t ever, ever ring the bell.
Begin well, continue well, finish well.
Dr Linda Evans│Principal
More News…
Fairholme's Campdraft team made history over the Spring holidays as the first all girls' school to ever take out the win! Ten Fairholme girls, captained by Abbey Gordon and Charlotte Mailler, competed in the Ariat High School Campdraft Percentile Cup, earning the top team spot with an impressive average of 87 points. With 39 schools represented in the Pittsworth event and more than 500 first-round runs, this was no small feat by the team. Each girl rode beautifully, showing true skill, teamwork, and sportsmanship. There were so many comments about what a classy victory it was.
With 29 teams and more than 300 girls stepping onto the court this year, Fairholme’s netball program has enjoyed a hugely successful 2025 season. From the very first pass to the final whistle of the season, Fairholme was a dominant force in the Saturday Association competition. Seven teams earned their place in the Grand Finals, with five of them claiming the titles: > Cadet Intermediate A Champions – Junior Vicki Wilson 1 > Cadet C Champions – Fairholme Cadet White > Cadet Intermediate D Champions – Fairholme Junior Development > 13B Champions – Fairholme 13 Navy > 12B Champions – Fairholme 12 Gold Adding to this impressive tally, we celebrated two runner-up finishes with 13 Gold in the 13A division and 11 Gold in the 11B division. The success didn’t stop there. On Wednesday nights, all four Fairholme teams powered through to the Semi Finals, with three advancing to the Grand Finals. > Division 1 Champions – Senior Vicki Wilson 1 > Division 2 Runner-Ups – Senior Vicki Wilson 2 > Division 3 Champions – Junior Vicki Wilson 1 And at the Darling Downs Vicki Wilson Carnival, Fairholme once again stood tall. Both our Senior and Junior Vicki Wilson 1 teams qualified for the prestigious State Finals – one of only two schools in the region to do so. Against 24 of Queensland’s top school netball teams, our girls shone with our Junior Vicki Wilson 1 team finishing an incredible fourth, and the Seniors going undefeated through the pool rounds before finishing sixth overall. Our youngest athletes also made their mark. At the Andrews Cup Primary School Netball Carnival, the Senior A team were crowned A Division champions, showing that the future of Fairholme netball is just as exciting as the present. Of course, none of this would have been possible without the many people who support Fairholme Netball behind the scenes. This year, 21 of our own students took on the important role of umpiring across the season. Reflecting on the season, our Fairholme Netball Co-ordinator, Lis Irwin shared, ‘To see so many of our girls not only reaching finals, but also competing and succeeding at state level, is a testament to their hard work and love of the game. We’re so proud of every player, coach, and supporter who has helped make 2025 such a great year for Fairholme Netball.’ With so much talent rising through the ranks, Fairholme’s netball future looks brighter than ever.
On Friday 9 September, our Head of Teaching and Learning, Pam Stains, and our Head of Faith and Wellbeing, Cath Butler, were invited to present a session at the International Coalition of Girls’ Schools Symposium highlighting an important element of the Fairholme culture: Relational Pedagogy. At Fairholme, we believe that learning begins with relationship. That when a girl feels safe, seen, and supported, she is far more likely to flourish - not just academically, but emotionally and socially too. This belief isn’t just a nice idea; it’s a lived reality, reflected in the feedback from staff and students collected through interviews and surveys conducted by Professor Andrew Hickey from UniSQ in 2024. We’ve long worked in the “with” quadrant of Ted Wachtel’s social discipline window - doing things with students, not to or for them. However, a few years ago, we noticed something. While our restorative approach was helping resolve conflict, it often came too late. Teachers were feeling stretched, and students - especially in moments of challenge - needed more than resolution. They needed connection and they needed skills. This aligned with research supporting the idea that our students have varying levels of skill in demonstrating empathy or engaging with others using social and emotional intelligence, and therefore have varying ability or desire to resolve conflict restoratively. It’s not a will problem, this is a skill problem. So we asked ourselves: what could help staff to enhance the skill level of students struggling to meet expectations, whilst still strengthening connection and building relationships? That question led us to Dr Ross Greene’s Collaborative and Proactive Solutions (CPS). CPS is a gentle, trauma-aware approach that sees behaviour not as defiance, but as communication. A child who struggles isn’t choosing to misbehave, they’re lacking the skills to meet expectations and communicating this in a variety of ways, using behaviour that will either frustrate us or engender empathy. And so, instead of reacting, we slow down. We listen. We work with them to understand what’s hard, to build the skills they need, and see the change. To strengthen this approach in the college, in 2025, twelve staff members joined a CPS pilot program. These staff were offered professional learning time to train, reflected, and practise and what they found was remarkable. Relationships deepened, classrooms became calmer, students began to take ownership - not just of their behaviour, but of their learning. Teachers felt more regulated, more connected, and more hopeful. Instead of asking what’s wrong, in this approach, we seek to ask: what’s hard? What skills might be lagging? What expectations are difficult to meet? It’s a small shift, but it’s changing the way we see our girls, and the way they see themselves. Students are not problems. Rather, we collaborate, and become problem solvers together. Of course, it’s not always easy. CPS takes time. It asks us to stay curious longer, to resist the urge to fix, and to trust the process. But the rewards are real. From 2026, our staff training will evolve to include both Restorative Practices and CPS—under the banner of Relational Pedagogy. Because at Fairholme, we’re not just teaching content, we’re building skills now and into the future. And, we’re doing it together, with collaboration, and enjoyment.
